I don't wear an apron, but it sure feels like it. Today my oldest daughter starts college, my oldest son starts driving and my youngest daughter who is only 12, is going cliff diving in Acapulco. No, wait, that last one was a bad nightmare I just had. Don't worry, I would never let my 12 year daughter go jumping off a 70 foot ledge into a violent shark infested ocean without inviting me to join her. Anyhow, what is a dad to do when his family grows up so fast? How will they survive? I think the right answer is to trust God. Let him be their dad. But where is he? I don't see him, I have never heard his voice, does he sound like Charleston Heston? Trusting God can be harder than you think...especially when it is with your very own precious children. I do know that over the last 49 years he has taken great care of me. He answers my prayers, he has brought the right people in my life when I needed them, his word has guided me through the toughest of personal storms. He has even given me money when I was broke. I once found a hundred dollar bill in my student mail box in an unmarked envelope. I know he made one of his angels personally deliver it to me because it had some glitter on it. So yeah, I know God really is there. If that is true for me, why don't I expect it to be true for my kids? Control, I like to be in control. Sadly, wanting control is a sign I think I can do things better than God. God comes through for me, but it feels like I need to come through for my kids. When did I become the Savior of the World? That is a joke. Just listen to how powerful our God really is: "In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook; they trembled because he was angry. Smoke rose from his nostrils; consuming fire came from his mouth, burning coals blazed out of it. He parted the heavens and came down; dark clouds were under his feet. He mounted cherubim and flew; he soared on the wings of the wind...He reached down from on high and took hold of me...he rescued me because he delighted in me." Psalm 18:6-10, 16 &19 After reading God's word I am ashamed of my arrogance. Why do I think I could ever do as good a job of caring for my kids as him? He is Lord! I think most of us will say we believe he exists, but when it comes to real life and our own kids, we stop believing. God isn't just our God, he is our child's as well. And by the way, I realize that I have gotten one other thing wrong, my daughter is no longer a child. She is a very trust-worthy and capable adult. God raised her and crafted her to be that way! So here it goes, I take out the scissors and "Clip, clip, clip!"
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For God did not give us a spirit of fear. He gave us a spirit of power and of love and of a good mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 This past Sunday I thought I was sharing a rather innocuous illustration from the pulpit; little did I realize that I lit a spark that started a firestorm on-line. The subject was about homeschooling. Ironically, two days before this discussion a person asked me for my opinion about the differences between Public, Private and Homeschooling. And now, after reading the heated debate over my sermon, I thought it might be a good time to post a paper I put together years ago for parents in my youth group. The choice of where to send a Christian child to school was a subject I had to deal with often because parents wanted to know where I stood as their child's youth pastor? They wanted to know if I would support the decisions they made concerning their kids, and they were not sure they could trust me. So believe me, I know just how hot and volatile of a subject this is ... and I also have four kids in school. So I am on this journey as well. Some parents, however, don't see this topic as that big of a deal; while other parents see it as the most important decision they ever had to make concerning their children. So I enter with extreme care, I know that many parents have spent years praying about how to raise their kids, and who they will entrust them to. Some very strong convictions have been formed. And sadly, this discussion has a nasty way of spiraling down into a competition between families and friends, We secretly love comparing our kids with one another. Lets stop that nonsense now! I just want to get you to think. Keep your mind on your own children and what God would have you to do with their education. It is my firm conviction that no matter what choice you make, Public - Private - Home, you as the parent are the single most important influence on your child's life. I believe that if you are a loving and vigilant parent, you will have no problem navigating your child through each arena of education with joy and success. I think we often give too much power to a system or an ideal, and not enough to the parental bond that was designed by God. I also want to stop allowing fear to rule our decisions. Some parents make choices by believing wacky conspiracy theories (ie: John Dewey, the architect of our public schools, wanted to demonically brainwash our children through the department of education) or projecting their childhood hurts and personal hang-ups on their children. We have been given a sound mind by God to think through what is the best choice for our children, and not be controlled by superstition. So to help you, I have put together a chart that outlines what I believe are some possible weaknesses in each system that you have prepare your child for. They are generalizations, basic ideas to help you work through. And I hope it will give you some different categories to consider as you pray through your child's educational future. If you notice I have compared each educational arena by categories. Each word describes different negative tendencies that can adversely affect your child. If your child already is struggling in a certain area, it may be wise to make sure the system you choose doesn't increase the negative tendency your child currently struggles with. Follow along and it will start making sense.
EACH SYSTEM'S EFFECT ON THE INDIVIDUAL AS A CHRISTIAN Public School: Worldly Influences ----- The worldly tendency of the public school system is the most obvious and talked about problem for the Christian student to face. This system is built on a materialistic worldview. That means evolution, religious tolerance and political correctness will be pushed, and to think your child will not be taught these views by their teacher is simply ignoring the stark reality of the moral decay that is happening all around us. To not prepare your student for this is irresponsible. But I must also add, your ability and influence as a parent to speak into your child's life through each stage of development is more important and potent than you think. Private School: Reality of Hypocrisy ----- Most private schools have the word "Christian" on the outside of the building but that doesn't necessarily mean that people are acting like Christians on the inside. There often is an assumption that a person going to a Christian school has Christ in their life; it is easy to assume that the rest of the students in the school are all on the same page, and that they all think about God the same way. This simply isn't true. An authentic walk with Christ requires a change in the heart, not merely having your name put down on a classroom roll. Homeschool: Assumed Piety ----- It is quite a sacrifice to home-school your children, Not only are you taking on the daily responsibilities of teaching curriculum and grading papers; but the decision to turn your home into a school-house runs counter-cultural to most of your friends and family. Often, you and your kids may see yourselves as a special group of people that God has uniquely set apart. Feeling like you are an 'alien' in a strange land can present to your children a false sense of piety - - believing they are more sold out for Jesus than the average Christian, when in fact they are just going to school. EACH SYSTEM'S EFFECT ON THE INDIVIDUAL EMOTIONALLY Public School: Insecurity ----- Public school can be a rough place to grow up, it is both highly competitive and seductive. If your kid is not prepared or spiritually strong, the public arena will cause them to ask a lot of questions about their individual self: "Am I accepted, am I cool, and am I able?" If your child is a follower, the popular groups who adopt the popular trends can often carry great influence on a child's heart. Worth often is determined by winning: At sports, studies and social groups - - if you are not on the top, you can easily feel alone and worthless. Parents of public school children need to take the time to build security, belonging and acceptance in the heart of the child, or the school just might eat them alive. Private School: Superiority ----- This is another very difficult arena to grow up in. The same temptations and desire to fit in is still there; but students in the private school can tend to think that since it is a Christian place these influences are not as bad as the public school kids around them. In fact, the irony about private school, is that the pressures of competition and fitting in may actually be much worse than you could ever imagine. When your child thinks they are attending a place that is on spiritually higher ground it breeds pride, and as a result many students are inoculated from thinking they need to change. Wearing a uniform or having classes on theology does not mean you actually are closer to Jesus than the average Joe. Homeschool: Naivete' ----- When you are the only one in your grade, you have no basis to compare, no one to push you or challenge you, and this can give you a very skewed view of yourself and where you fit in the world. It is hard to see yourself rightly. Some parents will only encourage and compliment thinking any negativity is harmful, when the truth is, children need to know when they fail or when they are not talented. Sometimes the loose schedule in some homes and constant personal attention can build false expectations about the world that awaits them outside the home. The world is not kind, and if your children are not prepared for that it can cripple them. EACH SYSTEM'S EFFECT ON THE INDIVIDUAL'S VIEW OF THE NON-CHRISTIAN Public School: Sympathy ----- When your child grows up with a group of friends that are not Christian, after awhile it is easy for them to adopt their same worldview and values. As a public school parent it is easy to fall in-line with the system and doing all you can to have your child be accepted and win. Sports and activities can start taking control of your agenda and over time the need to tell others of the gospel is easily silenced by busyness of school. Also, to the average on-looker, many times it can seem like the non-Christian group at school has more godly qualities of acceptance and kindness than the Christian group. So why would the gospel be attractive when the Christians aren't? Private School: Apathy ----- When the Bible becomes a textbook something is lost. The need to have your theology right for a test can skew the purpose of why it was given - - to have a genuine concern for a lost world. Christian schools have to be careful about having their students becoming head-smart without becoming heart-broken. And if some of the kids are not Christians themselves, they will start seeing the Bible only as another class and never feel the need to have Jesus everyday in their lives. Homeschool: Anxiety ----- Are all non-Christians smoking, drinking, having sex and wanting the one world order? Of course not, but some homeschooled kids think so. When you communicate that one of your purposes is to shelter your children from an evil world, they may start believing the world is more dangerous than it actually is. Evil is not overt, it is subtle; it lurks in the heart of everyone, even the homeschooler. But when some parents talk about evil, they tend to focus on the overt acts like drugs and drinking and don't talk about real darkness like selfishness and conceit. If this is how your child views the world then when they meet a non-Christian they tend to see more darkness in the heart instead of the same that your own child carries around. Small things like other kids swearing and watching R-rated movies can strike major fear in a homeschooler's heart, when it may be nothing more than bluster and insecurity. The same insecurity you must deal with in your own child's heart. Hopefully this will give you something to think about. It is not intended to condemn but to raise concern. Ask yourself: Are your children flourishing where they are at? Do you need to put them in a place that challenges them? And the most important question of all: Why did God give you children? To stay safe or to be sent? "The proverbs of Solomon: A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son brings grief to his mother." Proverbs 10:1 I once knew a man, a very wise and caring man. He had two sons.
One son grew up to be a leader of men. Very successful, with a heart for God. The other son took a pistol to his head and fired. One night in the darkness of his soul, the second son decided to selfishly end his life. No note was left, just a small handgun still clutched in a lifeless hand. The father blamed himself ... for years. I met him while he was teaching theology in one of my seminary classes. He was a very brilliant and thoughtful teacher, he also seemed to keep his personal feelings to himself - - that is, until one class when he began weeping uncontrollably in front of his students. I will never forget that class. It all began when a very arrogant student in class made this statement during a discussion on discipleship, "I see no reason in the world why a child who grows up in a godly Christian home shouldn't become a Christian? If a child doesn't accept Christ, it has to be the parent's fault for their unbelief." My professor, the man with two sons, looked at the student and in a low slow cadence replied, "I am not so sure you can make a blanket statement like that until you have children yourself?" The arrogant student retorted, "Oh sure I can. I was raised in a home where my parents properly taught me the scriptures and raised me in the 'fear and admonition of the Lord.' If other parents would be consistent and not so lazy, maybe our churches would be full of 'on fire' disciples? It is definitely the parents fault for apathy in the church." The man sat down, and remained silent while tears slowly began rolling down his cheeks. After about a minute he stood up and said, "People are broken and everyone needs the mercy of God if they are ever going to know the Savior. To blame the parents for lack of faith is not just wrong-headed, but cruel. There are many godly parents who are silently suffering because their children want nothing to do with God even though they did everything right. Remember, Ezekiel 18:20 says, 'The soul who sins shall die...The son shall not suffer the iniquity of the father, nor the father for the iniquity of the son.'" The student wouldn't quit, "I still say scripture places the onus on the father. Ephesians 6:4, 'Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the fear and admonition of the Lord.' See, clear as crystal - good fathers raise good sons.'" The teacher, with grief stricken eyes and pinched brow said, "My son shot himself." The room went silent. The arrogant student quickly hung his head. The teacher sobbed. After a few minutes he cleared his throat and said: "I am sorry for my outburst. Ten years ago while I was pastoring a medium sized church on the West Coast, I received a life-altering phone cal. My son was travelling home for the Thanksgiving holidays to see us, and while he was spending his layover in an airport hotel, he took out a small handgun and decided to end his life. It was the worst season of depression I ever experienced. For months and months I cried out to God asking why? I loved my son. All growing up my oldest son had a heart for God; but this son, my youngest, always wrestled with the deep questions of life. He was never satisfied by the answers. I tried to raise him right, I would often go to his room when he was a teenager and just talk to him, pray with him, and even plead with him. He never could trust the heart of God. For the next two years I blamed myself. Here I was a pastor, a teacher of theology, always the smartest one in the room, with a dead son. I poured over the scriptures, and the passages of parental responsibility seemed to point at me like an accusing judge, 'Raise a child in the way he should go...', 'Teach your child when you are rising up, walking down the road,...', etc., etc,' Then I decided to go to the book that had the most advice for child rearing, the book of Proverbs. I noticed immediately that in this book the tone was different, 'Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and jewels for your neck.' (1:8-9). 'My son, if you receive my words, and treasure up my commandments with you, then you will know the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.' (2:1-5). Proverbs seemed to be placing the responsibility of obedience of the response on the child. In the book of Proverbs, the majority of the time it is the son's choice to decide what kind of life he wants. Children are responsible too! Over the years I would go back to this book and keep reading it because it is clear, both parties have a role to play: the father in love teaches, the son in trust obeys. This book saved my life, I no longer felt condemned. My son made his own choice, he chose his own path. My grief is still intense, but I realized I cannot carry the guilt of another." The class said nothing, the arrogant student apologized, the teacher nodded in silent recognition. The answer is clear: The one who sins will die. Case closed. "The one who receives instruction in the word should share all good things with their instructor." Galatians 6:6 It was labeled "shock humor." I remember it well, the year was 1999 and I was a youth pastor at the time. The students in my youth group were discussing a comedian named Tom Green. He had an edgy new show on MTV and it was supposed to be absolutely hilarious. His favorite source of material for his plot-lines was from designing new ways to terrorize his parents. On one episode he thought it would be crazy funny to wake his mom and dad up from a dead sleep at 3:00 in the morning to see if they wanted to watch a Bon Jovi concert video with him. He once painted their house plaid while they were away on a canoe trip, and he even had a pornographic picture screen-printed on the hood of his dad's car. His most notorious stunt was placing the bloody severed head of a cow in his parents bed while they were sleeping. Apparently they were big "Godfather" fans and he thought they would just love it. They hated it. However, it didn't matter to him because he was garnering attention & advertisement dollars off of his parent's shock. I decided to watch one episode just to see what he was like so I could intelligently discuss him with my students, and all I found was a man who had absolutely zero respect for the dignity of his parents. You could visibly see the disgust they had for their son, all the while pretending to be amused...It was sick. The viewing audience lapped up this vile stuff believing it was all hilarious innocent fun. But to me, it was one of the clearest violations of "Honor your Father and Mother" that I ever saw. He uncovered and made sport with the very people he should have been most grateful and respectful to. Pride &Youth Culture Humility in our culture is not valued. Pride and the promotion of self is; and our children daily live and breathe in this self-obsessed spirit-of-the-age. They have been raised to be stars, the most important person in the room. Psychologists and counselors of today call it building self-esteem; we are told that this is a good thing. Whereas, medieval sages and teachers of the past used a negative Latin term for this attitude called "Vanagloria." (vain glory). In Catholic literature this became one of the seven deadly sins. Mirror gazing and self-promotion has now become a virtue for kids in our culture. This is especially true when it comes to the way we have taught them to view authority. Like the example of Tom Green's parents; children and teens across the board have learned to de-value the role of mom and dad. For Tom, his parents became the object of his cruel humor; and for your average student, parents have morphed into their domestic cruise directors: "Are you having fun son? I hope dinner is to your liking? And am I offering you enough exciting opportunities to choose from during the week?" Heaven help the parent whose children are ever bored or lonely! This over-zealous personal butler attitude has even spilled over into the church. If students don't like youth group, if the sermon is too long, if the songs have a monotone cadence, the family must leave and find a new place that their precious children will like. We cow-tow to their every whim, they are nurtured on narcissism. And this lack of humility won't stop when they move on and begin attending college - - it may actually grow into an un-controllable monster. Listen to a quote by one Christian professor as he noticed the attitude of some of his new students: “I find that many Christian students have allowed knowledge and critical study of art, music, philosophy and other areas of higher learning to cause arrogance and sophistication to plant a bitter root of doubt and disdain for their early Christian learning in their heart. Arrogance says that the rest of the world is clueless and ignorant. Sophistication believes that no one back home that I grew up with understands quite like me and the influential new teachers and friends that I now have. This is simply not true, and in fact arrogance is one of Satan’s most deadly tools to throw impressionable Christians into vast mazes of confusion and destruction for many years of their young adult lives.” Humility's Beauty What the world has failed to understand is just how beautiful humility actually is. Not only are humble people easy to be around, but they are truly grateful for the years of teaching they received from their parents, pastors and teachers. Humility recognizes that everything I have was first given to me. Humility takes into account the love that has been shown. Kevin DeYoung puts it like this, "Think of your Sunday school teachers. Think of your youth group leaders. Think of your pastors. Think of your dad. Think of your grandparents. Think of your mom. Did they not have your best interests at heart? Did they not love you? Were they imposters? Were they wrong in everything they stood for? Is it reasonable for you to conclude that those who came before you, those who taught you to trust the Bible, those who have more experience and probably more wisdom than you - that suddenly they are benighted morons? Are they deserving of your cynicism, rejection, or scorn?...Parents and pastors aren't perfect, even the really good ones...But here is the point, and it's very appropriate for teens and twenty-somethings who like to question every authority except their own: before you leave behind what you used to believe about the Bible and God, consider who taught you to believe what you used to believe." This kind of understanding requires humility. God asks us to respect the authorities that are placed in our lives because it is for our own good. People who love you don't primarily do it to control, but to bless. And that is something to be thankful for. And if you are thankful, tell them. Let them know what they mean to you. I find that the more ungrateful you are, the more pride has a hold on you. And pride is a very ugly thing! “I’m washing my hands of the people of this land. From now on they’re all on their own...Dress up like a stupid shepherd. I’m going to install just such a shepherd in this land—a shepherd indifferent to victims, who ignores the lost, abandons the injured, and disdains decent citizens. He’ll only be in it for what he can get out of it, using and abusing any and all.” Zechariah 11:6 & 15-16 (The Message) Can you believe it, Karl Marx and I see eye to eye?
Before you jump to any ridiculous conclusions, you need to know I am not embracing communism. Never! But being the humble man that I am, I am willing to admit that sometimes even a crazy lunatic can make some sense. As the old saying goes, "Even a broken clock is right twice a day." Here is Karl's pearl of wisdom that I shockingly agree with: "Neither a nation nor a woman is forgiven for an unguarded hour in which the first adventurer who comes along can sweep them off their feet and possess them." Such profundity. Americans and Hopeless Romantics have much in common, they are both rather easy to fool. A little flattery here, false promises there, fireworks and bright lights, and the gullible dreamer is hooked. More times than not, they blindly believe to their own destruction. HOPELESS ROMANTICS I have always wondered why the bad guy wins the pretty girl's heart? All through high school I sat in the cafeteria watching the prettiest and sweetest of ladies fall for the foulest of beasts. After years of contemplating this conundrum, I came to a conclusion: Creeps and Jerks lie the best. Nice guys have an irrational urge to always tell the truth - - they have never learned the fine art of creating false image and promising empty excitement. What you see is what you get with the nerd and shy guy; and honestly most men, when you really get to know them, are rather dull. In order to look exciting and taken for a wild, hip, dangerous man - - the male gender must put on an act. And for some reason, to the pretty girl, the bigger the jerk the better. A little scent of evil on a guy works like a charm in catching the easy female prey. But image only goes so far. A guy who lies to you to hook you, usually has nothing of substance to keep you. And after he gets what he wants from you, he will not stick around. Happens every-time. My advice for the hopeless romantic - - try giving the nice guy another chance. AMERICAN VOTERS I believe the lying principle is also true when it comes to politics - - the best liars win the most votes. The crowd is gullible. Candidates cut out of the Machiavellian mold are experts at promising things they don't usually intend to keep. To get your vote they will jump through hoops, kiss babies, order a burrito at Chipotle, and pretend that they are your best friend. When a sharp dressed man or woman steps up to a podium, bites his or her bottom lip and says, "I am speaking for the American people," look out! - they are playing you for a fool. They know how to say exactly what you want to hear. Just look at the past few presidents who sat in the oval office...do you really believe they meant what they said? And now we have the wackiest pool of possible Republican and Democratic nominees I have ever seen. The Donald...seriously? Hilary….are you kidding me? Do you really think they are telling us the truth? If they make it into the highest level of our government, will they really make policies that benefit the average man? Or are they on a mission to promote their own legacy? So what are we to do? First of all, stop buying the popular hype. Secondly, read, research, look at the past voting records of each candidate and vote for the one who will protect the most innocent in our society, the babe in the mother's womb. Finally, pray. I have become a cynical man, I don't trust many people in office, and that is not a good thing. I don't merely want to be a deconstructionist where I tear down people without building up. I don't want to mistrust everyone, but I don't want to be found a gullible fool either. All I am trying to say is that I think we have been lied to enough. We need to stop voting only to see our team win, we need to vote with the hopes of making this a better country. I hope we haven't reached the point in America where Israel did in Zechariah when God let the people have the "stupid shepherd." He put on the throne a leader who reflected the character of the people...and that turned out to be a very bad thing. Looking at our current choices doesn't really say much for the heart of the American people. So should we give up and move to New Zealand? I'd like to, but God planted me here in America. So instead of jumping on the band-wagon of big names and provocative soundbites, I hope we would all vote for someone who at least seems to be trying. Sound impossible? Maybe, but at least as Americans we can go down swinging. "Will you steal, murder, commit adultery, swear falsely, make offerings to Baal, and go after other gods that you have not known, and then come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, 'We are delivered!'" Jeremiah 7:8-10 Yesterday I was challenged in conversation by a friend who got me thinking much about myself and what I do for a living. I am a pastor, a shepherd of men and women. On any given Sunday the number of congregants could range from 500 to 800 people listening to my messages. Experts say the true number of church attendees needs to be counted on a three week basis because people come and go every-other week, but they still would consider themselves to be a part of the church. So lets make it 1,000 souls under my care. I wonder, how many of those 1,000 people have a real walk with the living God? And even worse, how many of them are just "Playing Church?" I know people will pat me on the back and say, "Oh, that is none of your concern. We really like you, just keep doing what you are doing." But what if what I am doing is just confirming people in their make believe? Am I being paid only to put on a show each and every Sunday like a performing monkey; or are people really growing and becoming more Christ like? Is there real community going on? These questions really matter to me. I have given my life to it...for cryin' out loud! If it is just a show, wouldn't it be better to shut the doors and send everyone home? God even asks this in the book of Malachi 1:10 when his people are offering skinny, sick and diseased animals for their offerings instead of the best of the flock, "Oh that there were one among you who would shut the doors, that you might not kindle fire on my alter in vain! I have no pleasure in you...." I would hate to find out after serving most of my life in the ministry, that my effort and the people who have sat week after week under my teaching, are just "sound and fury signifying nothing." JEREMIAH'S DIATRIBE Over the summer I have been meditating on the book of Jeremiah. For some reason it has always resonated with me. Maybe it is because Jeremiah was a cry baby like I am, and like me he wasn't liked much...whatever it is, this depressing book has always spoken to me. Simply put, Jeremiah is a book about certain judgment coming to God's people. Time and again he tried to speak to them, and yet because of their stubborn and rebellious heart (5:23), they wouldn't listen. Jeremiah pleads in 6:16-17: Ask for where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls. But they said, 'We will not walk in it.' 'Pay attention to the sound of the trumpet!' But they said, 'We will not pay attention.' Poor Jeremiah had it rough, no one wanted to listen to him or change their lives. Talk about playing church, the people of Israel were masters at it. And as a result they were judged by God. Eventually, the nation of Babylon invaded and destroyed the city of Jerusalem. If you want to read how bad it got, just read the book of Lamentations: "Jerusalem sinned grievously; therefore she became filthy; all who honored her despise her, for they have seen her nakedness; she herself groans and turns her face away." (Lamentations 1:8) It was bad. THE 4 PART PLAY Jeremiah tried to warn them. And in chapter 6 and 8 he describes the people's problem with clinical precision. On the outside they might say they were God's people, but if you were to do a close examination, there were four qualities and habits that unmasked their hypocrisy. Under the microscope of God's probing eye, he came to the conclusion that these people were only play acting. As I go through them, ask yourself, is this true of me? Part 1: Finding No Pleasure in God's Word (6:10 & 8:9) God wants a relationship with us, so he has spoken. The Holy Scriptures are his message to us. They are written down so everyone has equal access to the heart of God. Like a love letter from a far away land, the Bible is God's written communication to those whom he loves. If you love him, you will want to hear from him. But for the people of Israel, they had zero interest in his words. As a result, they didn't get to know him at all. In fact in verse 12:2 Jeremiah says, "You are near in their mouth and far from their heart." That is the epitome of play acting. "Oh sure I know God, I am a Christian, I go to such and such a church. But the Bible is so....well....boring!!" How do you know you are play acting? The word of God is not in your heart. Part 2: Everyone is Greedy (6:2 & 8:1) God wants us to find our satisfaction in him. To really enjoy him. But this was not so for the people in Jeremiah's time; they ran after everything else but God. They wanted things, they wanted pleasure, they wanted power. In fact, God was so saddened by this that he uttered one of the most tragic verses in all of scripture in Jeremiah 2:5 "What wrong did your fathers find in me that they went far from me?" In other words, God is asking his people, "What is wrong with me? Why don't you want me?" The answer is simple: Shiny things are more important to the play actor's heart, (ie: wisdom - riches - power), than knowing the person of God (9:23)? Are you the person who goes to church only to put on a show? Francis Shaeffer said the true sickness in the heart of most American Christians is their desire for 'affluence and personal peace.' "I want to be rich so I can be left alone." Is that true of you? Part 3: Declaring Peace when Trouble is on the Way (6:14 & 8:11) God is angry at sin - - but when you are play acting, everything, including warnings about sin, becomes a joke. We come to church for a show, not an encounter with holiness. Go on YouTube and look at the most popular praise music; doesn't it seem like it features beautiful, cool, young and sexy people who are great at acting holy, rather than finding truly holy people who can bring us into the terrifying presence of God. Even that phrase, "terrifying presence of God" makes most people nervous. "God is not terrifying, he is a nice guy." Who wants to play act when it could become dangerous? So we reshape the one we are worshiping into a romantic lover, a source of power that we connect to through tears and warm emotion. God is no longer Jehovah. Jesus has become to us a 'guy in skinny jeans' adorned with the latest cool hair cut. Messiah? What does that even mean? Part 4: No Shame (6:15 & 8:12) When you are only play acting, it doesn't matter what part you play. You are wearing a mask, so the lines you say, the scenes you act, are merely theater. They don't mean anything. In Jeremiah's day, life became a game. People experimented with life, and when they sacrificed children to the flames of idols, or had sex under spreading trees, who cared? To each his own. Well...God cared and he still cares. Listen to the language of Jeremiah 2:12, "Be appalled, O heavens, at this: be shocked, be utterly desolate, declares the Lord." Sounds to me like God really takes our lives serious. In our unblushing world of today, Christians are still experimenting. They actually think reality is theirs to mold and shape in any form they want. They even have made church to be a place of expanding experimentation. To prove my point I will mention one little phrase that epitomizes our lack of shame, "Love Wins." It can mean whatever you want it to mean, and in our arrogance we are expecting God to approve whatever we do. And all decisions are baptized with the play actors favorite word, "Love." But this love is a shameful type of love. A love that has no respect for the feelings of God. These four stages go in order, if you find yourself in stage one, be warned, stage 2 is coming. If you find yourself in stage 4, be terrified, there is nothing left but judgment. In simple terms, stop the act. It isn't working on God. He is not amused. THE STAGE I personally believe the play acting that is going is being performed on a universal stage. It is not something that only happens in mega-churches, and liturgical churches. It happens in a human's heart. For Israel, God was speaking to a whole nation of people. It wasn't the Mosaic System that was the problem, it wasn't the temple, it was the habits and expectations that characterized people. It was what was taking place in their heart. Listen to Jeremiah 17:9, "The heart is deceitful (play acting) above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it." Now that summer is winding down and the beginning of the new work year is gearing up, I will try to do a better job as a pastor. I will try to do more than keeping the gears, pistons and wheels of a large church going. I do not want to be to the one who only declares, "The Show Must Go On." I am not here to play an organ grinder. I believe I have been called by God to speak to people's heart. As we all prepare to get back to normal life, the more important question is this..."Will you personally stop the act. Will you once again listen to God?" Are you bored with the Christian walk? Does apathy characterize you? Well you aren’t alone. In fact, as a pastor of a relatively large church, a big part of my job is spent trying to motivate people to take their faith serious. Not an easy assignment. After a good 25 years in ministry I am convinced the trouble people have with following Jesus is very simple: We don’t take Jesus at his word. People will often tell me that the Bible is hard to understand. Sermons are confusing or irrelevant. The music doesn’t inspire. All smokescreens. I think the root of the problem is a lack of active faith - - people don’t live what they say they believe. I will give you one example that is centered on a really easy word. It is the word “MUST.” We all know what this word means, “It is an obligation, something that should not be overlooked or missed.” When an angry mom derides a lazy child with the word 'MUST' even a two year old understands it's clear intent. But when we come across the same word in scripture, many of us change it's meaning to “an action that is optional; something to do when I have the free-time; a suggestion to consider.” Take this verse for example: “This, then, is how you ought to regard us: as servants of Christ and as those entrusted with the mysteries God has revealed. Now it is required that those who have been given a trust MUST prove faithful.” 1 Corinthians 4:1-2 Or how about this one? “Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple MUST deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” Mark 8:34 Here is another: “We MUST pay the most careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.” Hebrews 2:1 I am not sure we take MUST seriously. When must becomes maybe, we have begun dictating to God, we stole his throne. And without knowing it, his importance and majesty means very little to us. We become bored with him. When we lose our respect for someone, our natural tendency is to write them off. Do you find yourself bored with the person of God? Have you written him off? Maybe the meaning of the word must does not mean what you think it means? I learned a very interesting concept about how the Hebrews understood the word “know.” Instead of seeing "knowing" as referring to the acquisition of knowledge; it means being implicated. If I know something, I am implicated in the knowing. In other words, I MUST do something about it. American knowing is simply the accumulation of knowledge. Our form of knowing is selfish, it is lazy, is is only for my benefit. No wonder we are bored, we are like the Venus Fly-trap in "Little Shop of Horrors." After we hear a sermon, or read a blog, we lick our lips, belch, and then once again say "Feed Me." To the true disciple of Christ, truth MUST be worked out. And when you work it out it becomes alive. Listen to Philemon 1:6, "I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ." Share to know, exercise to experience...knowing drives us to must. Are you bored? If you are, answer me this: "Can you really blame it on the preaching, the music, or the Bible?" Could it be you? “For when Gentiles, who do not have the law, by nature do what the law requires, they are a law to themselves, even though they do not have the law. They show that the work of the law is written on their hearts, while their conscience also bears witness, and their conflicting thoughts accuse or even excuse them on that day when, according to my gospel, God judges the secrets of men by Christ Jesus.” Romans 2:14-16 (this will be the last Acton Insight. I will not burden you with my notes on Adam Smith, Jefferson vs. Hamilton, or discussions concerning organic farming. Remember, I still want people to keep reading my blog.) Acton Insight 6: “How to talk about Natural Law” (Dr. Budziszewski) It was way too early in the morning to think. Especially when you consider my first class of the second day at the Acton Institute was titled, “Natural Law and the Classical Apologetics of Thomas Aquinas.” Hmm, that sounds like a real barn burner! But then in walked our teacher for the morning: a short hobbit looking man, sporting a neatly trimmed gray beard and brandishing an impish smile. His jolly demeanor sparked my curiosity. His name was Dr. Budziszewski (try saying that five times fast); and he began his class with an array of very interesting questions: “If we are just a random conglomeration of cells, why are human beings so perfectly adapted to live in a meaningless world?” “What does it mean to take the nature of our humanity serious?” “How can we speak with skeptical neighbors, college students and friends about true reality when most the time they are operating under ‘motivated irrationality’?” Dr. Budziszewski said the majority of the students in his classroom no longer seem to be persuaded by logic and reason because they are perfectly comfortable giving up coherence in order to get what they want. And what makes matters worse is that modern education aims for glibness over rationality. People would rather associate with the free-thinking and progressive crowd even if they were wrong; than being labeled as a drippy traditionalist. Who cares if someone is intellectually consistent? What matters most to people is who your friends are and what crowd you hang with. But then he said there are those special times when people can actually hear, when their ears are open. And it is in those moments we need to be ready to give them answers. We need to be prepared to have up-close and personal, one-on-one, heart-to-heart conversations. It is only in this context where barriers will come down and the mental smokescreens most people live with can be cleared away. And the best tool to break through the hardness of the post-modern’s heart is by appealing to “Natural Law.” Defining Natural Law Natural refers to the idea that “God has not left himself without a witness!” And that witness is imprinted on every soul. Law means the he has designed universal rules and measures that the mind recognizes as right and true for the common good. After teaching an introductory class on this topic, Dr. Budziszewski once had a student come up to him and ask, “How can you say murder is wrong for everyone? Isn’t that just our Western construct that we have projected on the rest of the world? We can’t assume to know what other cultures think is right or wrong?” And he replied back to the student, “Are you in doubt personally about the wrongness of murder? I am not asking you to speculate about others, not what irrationally, can be; but I want to know what ‘you know’ to be true, in your heart. Do you really think murder of innocents is ever O.K.?” This is what it means to appeal to a skeptic with “Natural Law.” Classical Natural Law Dr. Budziszewski makes the case that true arguments of Natural Law have been dumbed down by John Locke and other enlightenment thinkers. If you want to really understand the full-scope of Natural Law Theory you must go back to the writings of Thomas Aquinas. He lists four “witnesses” that God has woven into the fabric of reality that let us know that this world, and your life, has meaning and order. We need to be perfectly clear that no argument will fully convince anyone, but our goal is to open the human heart up to taking God and his word serious. The four witnesses are as follows...
All of these witnesses occur apart from God’s revelation. They whisper wisdom to the heart of the person. They are like Abel’s spilled blood that cries out to your soul in the silence of the night. Using Natural Law The skeptic is a tough nut to crack. So instead of forcing an argument on him from the outside through persuasion, let the Natural Law that's inside of him do the convincing. Our job is to point out what they already know. We are to call attention to the obvious, appeal to their deep consciousness. Dr. Budziszewski believes our job as apologists (defenders of Christian faith) is to help people to connect the dots that Natural Law has already hard-wired in their rational thinking. Ask the Pro-Choice advocate why suicidal depression is higher in woman who have abortions than women who go full term? Could it be the witness of natural consequences? Ask the atheist why he wants things to be meaningful in a meaningless world? Could it be the witness of design? Ask the agnostic liberal why black lives matter? Could it be the witness of patterned beings? He ended with this last tip of argument: "Don't be afraid of silence." In other words, once you ask the question let the person wrestle with the answer themselves. Our job is to get people to think again, to look at the world as it really is and give them the space to doubt. In fact, once the seed is planted let the Holy Spirit do the rest of the work...he really is a lot smarter and more convincing than you! "Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain." 1 Corinthians 15:58 There is a new cultural virtue in town, and it is for really cool people, it is called 'quitting.' Yeah, that's right, the thing your parents warned you never to do is now trending. When something is tough, frustrating, confusing or hard, just quit. Why should you keep going? It is so much easier and less stressful to just give up. And then while you are sitting back in your easy chair, you can laugh at all the hard working neophytes who are gutting it out. This is especially true with a new brand of Christian called a "Done." These are people who have had enough of playing church, putting up with frustrating people, going through the motions and they want to be set free from any organization or "institutional religion." It is now time to do it alone, to be done with all the non-sense of people and denomination. People are tired of quibbling over doctrine and color of carpet. "Me and God man, forget all the other baggage that goes along with Christianity, because I am done!" Here is how one Christian blogger, Zach Hoag, explains his decision to join the few, the proud, the 'Done': "I am 'done' – with evangelical church as usual. I’m done with any ministry obligation to that category and identity. I can’t do it anymore, and neither can my family. In that sense, I am graduating. That said, there is a flip side to the equation, and one that makes this promotion an emotional and spiritual move up rather than merely an ideological move left. Really, I find myself just as disinterested in being a good progressive as I am in being a good evangelical. This is a moving forward in that strange lane sometimes called the messy middle. There’s just not enough reason to stay committed to church institutions, because their primary concern is championing the popular justice issues of the day, and their leaders can be accessed through other means (books, conferences, blogs, etc.)." In other words, he is done with any label and group-think. He is free to be a Christian desperado. The Christian who reads his bible, a blog here and there, all the while singing Whitesnake's "Here I Go Again": An' here I go again on my own Goin' down the only road I've ever known, Like a drifter I was born to walk alone An' I've made up my mind I ain't wasting no more time So here I go again... I will admit that being part of an organization, a nation, a church and even a large family can be a pain in the rear. Every time people are involved and then must work together to accomplish a common goal, conflict happens. Whenever you get two or more controlling minds making decisions you are bound to have headaches and disagreements. And instead of learning to compromise, embracing mercy, and forgiving...it is so much easier to quit. It feels so good to leave in a huff, pick up your toys and say, "See ya' later suckers!" Are institutions a bad thing? _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ One of the most hated ideas and targets of rage for the "Dones" is the idea of the institution. Oh boy do they hate that word. To the "Dones" the word institution conjures up the image of a being imprisoned in a state mental home with Nurse Ratched while she is giving out pills and sedatives to keep people under her control. No laughter or joy is allowed, straight jackets of ties and dresses must be worn and absolutely no new ideas are to be tolerated. And if you try to change things or rethink the way to do church, so it isn't only a stiff rigid system, you know you will be called into the pastors office for some serious interrogation. Rebels must submit! As you wait for the dreaded church fuehrer to arrive, all you can hear is the constant drone of yellow neon lights buzzing on the ceiling. So for the "Dones" the only sane thing to do is breakout from the institution before you die inside. Climb out the window, escape over the razor wire, and speed off on your spiritual Harley never to be heard from again. You are finally free, you are done! But that is not really an accurate representation of what an institution is. A true institution is a society or organization that is set up to protect, preserve, and perpetuate what a community thinks is precious and praiseworthy. We all recognize the importance of keeping important things going. There are many things we put in place on an annual or even semi-annual basis because we consider it to be important to us. We just don't call them institutions. For instance... * Remembering birthdays is an institution in most families. Just stop having parties for your 5 and 6 year olds and I guarantee they will demand answers. They are expecting cake, ice cream and presents. And of course singing the familiar chorus of "Happy Birthday". So go ahead, as a fed up parent, just try to tell them no more birthday parties because "I am done!" It won't fly. * Hunting season. In Michigan, every November you can feel it in the air...it is time to "shoot us some deer." Just try to tell the average hunter that hunting season has been abolished. The wives have decided, they are done with it. It won't fly. * Fantasy Football...it is that time of year again. Yep, draft season is upon us and the fellas need to get together to pick their teams. Just try to stop us, it's tradition. It won't fly. Every one of those illustrations are rather silly when you compare them to passing down the eternal truths of Jesus Christ. The church matters to him, we are his bride. All through the New Testament the gospel writers implore us to keep working together, forgiving each other, loving, sacrificing, and "don't stop meeting together" because the issues of the soul must take priority in our lives. Saying you are 'done' is a sign you don't have a clue about the things that matter to God. Look at this one verse and then ask yourself, is the church really that important to him? "To me, though I am the very least of all the saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ, and to bring to light for everyone what is the plan of the mystery hidden for ages in God who created all things, so that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places. This was according to the eternal purpose that he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in him." Ephesians 3:8-12 If you are "done" it doesn't make you superior to the rest of the institutional church, you are just selfish. Humility is hard because it requires you to lose yourself for the sake of others, even if they are caddy, critical, complaining and cold. God expects you, as a Christian, to love them anyway. The most powerful aspect of God's love is that it creates the object of who he will love. God doesn't look for the person who is easy to love, but rather for the one who will bring him the most glory, a person who is his enemy. No one out of natural love pursues his enemy. But when God's love kicks in, you will. That kind of love is rare. If you are done with people and his church, you really don't know God. Nothing like summer. Nothing like vacation. And there is nothing like a hot yellow sun to melt your worries of the past year away. I love this time of year, there are so many memories to be made, and so much great music to listen to. If you were to ask me which music groups played the best summer songs, I would definitely place the Beach Boys on my top ten list. They have that endless summer thing going. We all are familiar with the classic hit, "California Girls;" an ode to America's finest in the female gender, it just oozes with care-free sand and surf vibes. And just think, it was written well before Kaitlyn and the Kardashians could taint it with their strange brand of the new Californian woman. Well, growing up listening to "California Girl" on the radio, I never considered that one day, one of those beautiful blond surfer girls would end up being my very own niece, Nicki. She is great gal, a true Californian, and I had a few days to hang out with her and her family by my mom's poolside. As the curious uncle, I began to ask her what it was like to be a West Coast Girl. I wondered, "Is it difficult growing up in image obsessed Orange County?" I wanted the juice, the raw truth of California living. What does it really take to be a true California Girl, are they really that different, are they a cut above the rest of regular American girls? Her answers were very surprising... Nicki on Herself: "I go to a large High School in Southern California called Dana Hills. It has 4,000-5,000 students who mostly come from wealthy homes with ambitious parents. I play volleyball and it is really competitive. In fact, competition is everything in my school: from dating to sports, those who are the best, those who win, are the most popular. But what really determines ranking in the social circles is determined by looks and body image. The prettier you are the more popular you become. I'll be honest, it's not easy." I asked her how it is different from the rest of America? She replied, "It seems like everyone in Southern California is pretty, and most girls in my school look like they are made of plastic, they are so perfect. So there is a lot of pressure to keep up." I wondered if there was such a thing as mean girls? "Oh sure, if you don't bother them or annoy them, for the most part they will leave you alone. But you learn how to navigate around school over time, no big deal." Nicki on Dating: "Dating is huge, because it gives you identity. Guys have lists of all the hot girls in school. They actually keep track of all the girls they kiss at parties. It is really sad. However, I have a boyfriend that is different. I really respect him because he keeps me centered. He doesn't care about popularity, and he has high moral standards. People at my school love to party, (slang for drugs and marijuana), and sex is considered a normal part of the dating life; but not to my boyfriend. He respects me and we have a great friendship built on conversation. This isn't true for most couples, in fact it seems like the crowd lives by the slogan 'Yolo.' Well, that is really no longer considered to be the in phrase, most students in my school just say 'F___ It! Why not?' They are immediate pleasure seekers with no care for the future." Nicki on Friendship and Social Media: "People in my High School don't really use Facebook; everything is 'Instagram' and 'Snapchat'...image and moment. Everyone wants to be seen as having the funnest time now. Beach parties are everywhere with beer flowing. People just get their older friends to buy, and no one asks about how old you are, and if they do it is easy to get a fake I.D. I must say good friends are rare...but the group of friends I have are really close. We share a lot together. I am really lucky." I asked what makes a good friend? "People who don't judge you on looks, but who accept you for who you are." Nicki on People: I asked her if she thinks there is a difference between living in California and the Midwest? "I think there is a smaller Christian population at Dana Hills. We have FCA, but there are few people that really go. Out of a thousand students, you might find six genuine Christians. People will say all that matters is to 'be love' but I am not sure they really know what that means. If you really were to evaluate people on how they live, it seems like what matters is how well they hold their own at parties and if they fit in with the right social groups." What really interested me the most about my discussion with Nicki was her heart for her friends, especially how they relate to their parents. Talking with her I realize that teenagers everywhere must wrestle with the brokenness of life, and parents pay a primary role in this. Nicki said the closer her friends are with their mom and dad, the more stable they seem to be. But good relationships are like a rare jewel. Divorce and the need to succeed seem to be destroying her friends parent's lives. No longer do parents seem to care about their kid's lives, because they are too worried about their own. Nicki on her Parents: "I am incredibly close to my parents, but as I grow dynamics in our relationship have changed. I care tremendously about their opinions and viewpoints on life, I just don't tell them as much as I use to. I guess I want to appear that I can figure life out on my own; but if I were honest, I still need my mom and dad more than ever. Just don't tell them." So as a curious uncle, what have I learned? The human heart never changes. God has wired us to belong to a family. God has designed us to need our parents. And while the world tries to convince us that we don't, our heart tells us different. California dreaming is just that...more hype than reality. So parents, never forget, you still matter. God made it that way! |
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